Guilt of infatuation!
In relationships, many suffer from what I call infatuation guilt. It is then when you meet a person and the feelings were out of the chain, very explosive, one could not eat or sleep thinking about that man or that woman. After two or three months and sex, one or both of them have lost that feeling of love.
Believe it or not, the reaction can be measured biologically within the brain by its secretion of phenylethylamine. Your body actually experiences this exhilarating sensation similar to that of cocaine or ecstasy. Yes, it can be a drug! But do you know why? It is a natural process that is designed to continue the species and help us reproduce. That’s why many say, “We had incredible chemistry,” but I said it was just a natural effect like drug use.
What we should all know is that love does not create this kind of euphoria in itself. Yes, you can have chemistry with love, but love itself is a strong connection between two souls.
But the nature of this article is to help you understand how one can become guilty for having strong feelings of love at first but not feeling the same anymore. Many relationships continue because of guilt or loneliness. Which means that most of us don’t want to be alone and use the other person to pass the time until one can find an improvement in male or female.
That is why he keeps cheating or talking to other men or women. Either they are looking for that feeling again or they are just trying to find something better. I’m sorry, but they’re looking for it in vain.
I hope you are not disappointed by what I am about to say, but please understand that all the novels and movies you read and watch make you feel or say “Aweeee, that’s so special!” This is not normally the case! They always show this perpetual love and love at first sight in movies and books.
True love doesn’t work this way at all !!! Yes, there is a connection at the beginning, but the feeling of love takes time to develop. Also, true love generally grows and changes within the relationship. You don’t have a constant high like the crush that eventually fades and never comes back …
Stop feeling guilty and go up the man or woman and let this person know how you really feel. If you are honest, maybe this is a person you will come to love through values and understanding. Stop looking for that feeling. Always evaluate the relationship rather than the person you are with. We always think that we can do better and improve our current love affairs. The question should be, “Are you doing better in this relationship” than ever? If you evaluate the person, their abilities, their education, you may be confused if it will work or not. Instead, you should know how this person makes you feel in the relationship.
Think of a relationship as a 3-legged stool, you, your partner, and the relationship come first. You cannot support one leg without the other. So the relationship is a leg unto itself and you should judge this more than you judge your partner.
Again, remove the blame, be honest, and let the splinters fall wherever they do. If you are not too attached to the outcome of the relationship, it could be the beginning of a true lasting love. You see that your soul mate could be that person you are looking at right now; but I still don’t know. Think about it!